Monday, September 24, 2012

The "Incident" September 12, 2012

Incident Report
Officer:  Sarge, Chief of Police, Blogville
Date: September 12, 2012  Time: All Afternoon Long
Violation:  Unauthorized Use of Motor Vehicle and Disorderly Conduct
Accused:  Puddles Duddles Rain…um…um…hmmm…
Witnesses:  Half of Blogville’s Residents
Primary Victim:  Sasha

  Description:  This officer responded to report of the unauthorized use of a motor vehicle.  Specifically, Ms Sasha’s Awesome Possum Pizza Truck.  Witnesses report Ms Rainwhatever did obtain keys to said snack truck and proceeded to abscond with said vehicle.  While operating said Awesome Possum Pizza Truck, she did, on multiple (really lots & lots) occasions commit the following violations:  driving recklessly, squealing tires and hollering in violation of Blogville’s noise ordinance, while driving with one paw she did litter by slinging awesome possum pizzas into the streets and targeting residents,  harassed citizens with soggy spit wads, threw a water balloon at the Blogville School Bus, and eventually did lose (total) control of the motor vehicle resulting in a collision and damages to the snack truck.  Fortunately, no one was injured, though many Blogvillians were really testy about the pizza splatters and slobbery spit wads.
A copy of this report is available for insurance purposes and will be provided as an exhibit for Mayor’s Court.
Citation issued by:  Sarge, Chief of Police

Mayor Frankie presiding FRANKly and ERNESTly Speaking
Judge Frankie I stand before you with evidence that I believe will prove that Miss Puddles D. Rainwater did on Wednesday, September 12, 2012 obtain keys and without permission drive our pizza truck to its doom. Before the "incident" as you can see above, our wonderful pizza truck full of yummy foodables for all.

The "alleged perpetrator"Miss Puddles D. Rainwater. I saw Puddles We 3 Doxies  reaching into Mommies pocket while she was very busy with customers and I heard something jingly sounding. I was also busy with customers and couldn't stop to see what she had. I also smelled beer and what I can only describe as "beer farts".

Mommy and I stepped out of the truck when we got a what I now know was a prank phone call, telling us to "run y'all ,there be  skunks on heres". We both ran out of the truck and suddenly the truck took off with Puddles at the wheel.

After the "incident", this is what was left of the truck. There were pizzas everywhere, flying out the back window and thrown all over blogland. If you bigify you can see who is driving. Poor Ernie got hit by a flying pizza and was dazed and confused for a while. Pip and many other residents dove in and took advantage of the free flying food. 

 Our total loss was 87 gazillion dollars exactly to the penny!

Here is a police sketch of the aftermath
This concludes my evidence on the pizza truck and I now ask for justice in this matter. Thank you Judge Frankie for listening. Miss Rainwater needs to learn from this and I trust you to rule accordingly.

I am also submitting this photo as evidence of a school violation regarding, putting notes on behinds without permission. My tail is still stinging after that day, I couldn't figure out why everyone was pulling it all day long. You may need to bigify .

I wait for your verdict.

Loveys Sasha H. Miller

p.s. can you please not be too harsh, since Puddles is my pal and I am hoping we can all go out for beer and pizza after the trial. 
p.s.s. I won't let her drive 


Dougall-the-Scottie said...

Oh dear.... That Puddles sure sounds VERY naughty!!

Bailey Be Good! said...

Just stopping by to wish you a very happy Monday!! :)

Woofs & huggies, <3

~Bailey (Yep, I'm a girl!)

Anonymous said...

BOL! Hilarious! Probably a good idea you don't let Puddles drive ;) Probably gonna have her license revoked anyway Hardy Har Har Oh! Did I laugh? Bad Dog Bad! ;)

Waggin at ya,

Unknown said...

BOL Puddles in trouble again? Have a wonderful Monday.
Best wishes Molly

3 doxies said...

It was an ACCIDENT I say...does you has any idea how accident prone I is? I couldn't helps dat da speed bumps gotted in my way...honest.
Bwhahahaha...okays but yellin' out da skunks was purty good huh? And not to mention hiiiiiiilarious. You should has seen da look on yours and your mom's face...PRICELESS!

Okay, see you in court.
Oh where should we afterwards fur a beer?

Puddles...in court

Unknown said...

I already bribed the prosecutor! You two will be able to party once again! And the people will pay for all the damage with their tax money! No problems!!!!
Lovies, Miss Mindy

My Mind's Eye said...


Lovable Lily said...

We're anxiously awaiting the outcome of the trial. All us spectators are sending out Tweets like kerazy. Have you seen all the pawpawrazzi outside with their cameras? I thought I also saw FOX News too.

I agree tho, Mayor Frankie needs to go easy on Puddles.

Lily Belle & Muffin

ShellePenn said...

We think she should have had community service, too... helping all the blogville people.

And no Bud Light, either! :)

Shelle, Milo, Dixie and Newby,

GOOSE said...

Miss Shata you know I love ya (not the way that your Remington does, but like a good friend does). But I really believe that Miss Puddles did not mean to harm anyone. I do believe that she thought she was saving or city from possible possum invasion. She thought she saw some of those pizzas come back to life (possums do play dead). And as Mr. PIP pointed out it could have been big trouble for Bloggvile if all those possums sprang up off the pizzas and started running amuck scaring puppies and kittens. The prank phone call was the only way to get you and your mom out of harm's way. She took off with the truck without any thought of safety for herself. I am sure we can fix up your truck even better than ever. I know a few junk yard dogs who are pretty good at making all wrecks look new. Hoping we all can sit down after this whole mess is over and have a beer or 12.

Frankie Furter and Ernie said...

Sasha, I hope that you are satisfied with my VERDICT and the SENTENCE (Period).
I did NOT think that JAIL time would be Fair... to the OTHER INMATES. I mean they are in there to learn how to BEHAVE and I don't think adding PUDDLES to the PUPulation would do ANYBUDDY ANY good... I'm just sayin.
I think the Punishment Fit the Crime.

Finn said...

BOL! I am with ya on going out for pizza and beer afterwards!

Anonymous said...

OK, but we are still mad, we never got any pizza. Puddles looks good in stripes.

Your Furends
Susie & Bites

Matilda the Boxer said...

I just hope after the trial we can all go out for beer and cheetos! Let's all be furiends. :)

The Army of Four said...

Oh my. This is just all pretty shocking!
Play bows,

The Websters said...

It's going to be a very long three days without her hunting!

Have you recovered from Friday?


Jan Mader said...

Shocking news that leaves me laughing until I cry!

WFT Nobby said...

Wow Sasha, you are a most generous spirited pup. Your final plea for clemency for Puddles is heart warming (although more than he deserves, methinks).
Toodle pip!

Dachshund Nola said...

BOL good luck

Scooter said...

Hey Sasha!
Wow, I'm so glad justice was served...and that should mean that snacks are served too! BOL Can we all have treats now since our work is done? I can tell you that Ernie was pretty happy about having all of that cheese to work on! BOL
Grr and Woof,
Sarge, COP

Ruby said...

OMD!! Sasha, you are hilarious!! (beer farts!!! had Ma spittin' out her soda all over the keyboard!!!)
BTW: I smelled them, too!! Pure Puddles! hehehe
I collected 87 dollars and some foodables and drinkies for the Puddles defense fund....I say.......PAWTY at Puddles!!
(Since she be under house arrest)



Remington said...

I am SO sorry I wasn't able to come to court with you. The accident was bad enough but the sign on your back....NOT FUNNY! I just read the verdict and I hope you can now get some rest....I'll call you later on....hugs!

3 doxies said...

Thank dog all dis is behind us...and da farts too....get it...bwhahahahaha...geez I cracks myself up. Anyways, I guess I'll has to go along with his Honorable Farter's verdict even though it will potentially hurt business fur awhile but I'll make it up to you soon as my 3 days is up.

Puddles Wannabees would be kinds awesome donchoo think?


3 doxies said...

Oh I has your money...does you has change fur a nickel? Oh just take it all, you deserve it fur all da truble I caused.
Please give my apologies to your mom again...darn speed bumps.

We meet up at O'dark thirty...prime hun...er, dats it a good time to watch nature. I has da cheetos! Maybe Nora can come and bring some vodka.


Ziggy Stardust said...

I love Nora and I am good with the vodka but I am never getting on her sled again. That girl takes her job way too serious. She is a good hunt...nature finder.

Loveyss Sasha

3 doxies said...

Actually, I was thinkin' of Amanda Bynes nowadays...girl can't drive worth a crap.
Who's gonna play you?


Bella Roxy & Macdui said...

Maybe she should be fined 87 cartons of Cheetos and 87 slabs of beer. Then we can have a huge Blogville Forgiveness Party...just a suggestion.

XXXOOO Daisy, Bella & roxy

Unknown said...

Oh NOES! SASHA! You must make Puddles skip dessert when you all goes out! Naughty girlz not get dessert!


Angels Amber and Max DaWeenie and Mom said...

Dis makes me wonder if Puddles can hold her licker. After da truck incident, maybees you should stick to cola products!

Lorenza said...

Puddles in trouble???
Kisses and hugs

The Daily Pip said...

Yawn ...am I too late? Hey, where did everybody go?

Your pal, Pip

Two French Bulldogs said...

a roomer...Puddles is in trouble, BOL
Benny & Lily

kissa-bull said...

may we suggest cheeto and alcoholics anonymous for miss puddles duddles tee hee

pibble sugars
brinks and bella

Tweedles -- that's me said...

hi Sashy

Sankissjuice said...

Hehe...this story makes me smile. Puddles is really funny. She must have done all that in jest. You two will be out clubbing soon.


SquirrelQueen said...

Oh Sashy, it must have been hard for you having to relive the stress of the accident.

We hope Puddles has learned her lesson. We just got a text from her saying there is a party tonight at her house. We hope someone hid all the car keys.

Cindi Lou & The Kitty Krew